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Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Should You Tell Him You Are Not A Virgin Anymore?

In today’s world, virginity is not so much of an issue. But in the Philippines especially in areas like where I come from, virginity is still a major concern. I think the society still puts high regards to a woman’s virginity. So the issue of telling your partner that you are not a virgin anymore is troubling quite a few. Should you tell him that you are not virgin? Should you confide to him that you’ve had your experience with sex? Or should you hold back confessing such a sensitive matter? But what if you are about to marry the guy you really want? Is it time to tell and narrate your sex-capades in all its fine points and splendor?
Let’s talk about this issue in the context of Philippine culture, because in other countries, without naming one, there’s a race at losing ones virginity, or well, if you are a virgin, you are the exception and not the general rule. And if you are a man, finding a virgin woman is like winning the lottery !

So anyway, to confess or not to confess? Personally, I think it’s better to not to confess to you boyfriend about your virginity status yet, and yes even if you are already engaged. There is always the risk of break-up especially prior to marriage. Revealing a very personal secret might be used by your partner against you. If you keep it a secret for the time being, then in case you break up your secret is still intact.

However, if you are already SERIOUSLY talking about marriage, HONESTY is very important. HONESTY maybe the cruelest at this instance because you can hurt your boyfriend and you fear rejection. But if you are to live the rest of your life with your man, you need to bring to the surface all your secrets, mistakes and shortcomings for him to endure and accept. Coming out to the open about your past is like redefining your relationship with your future husband. If he accepts you, and melts all your imperfections into one flame with a simple “I Love You”, you know it‘s love! You couldn't be wrong!

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